Thursday, June 13, 2013

Letter to my 21 year old self - a link up


I debated pretty hard about participating in this link up - Love me some Holly but my 20's pretty sucked and yes it was my fault - so I decided to go ahead and participate.

Dear my 21 year old self..

No getting married at 19 was NOT brilliant - save yourself a few more years of heartache and divorce him now. He won't change, he won't get help and its not your issue to fix - you can't fix it.  In fact learn this now - you can't fix anyone and its not your job to do so.

Oh and in a few years you will meet a man and have the chance to move to Florida DON'T - I repeat DO NOT fucking go - it will turn out worse than being married to an abusive man.

Do not take the things that happen when your grandmother passes away personally - you do not have the entire story and won't until you are in your 30's.  If you do it will lead to years of being estranged from all 3 of your sisters and one day you will wake up and 16 years will pass, you will be on the verge of 40 and will still not be speaking to them.

Look at things from a different perspective - yes even when its your fathers - instead of getting in the mindset of "Its my life and I can fuck it up brilliantly" because Darlin' you do and it takes years before you are able to trust anyone and even your own decisions.

Above all keep your chin up - you do make it through this, and you make it through wonderfully. By 26 you meet a man who you do marry, you doesn't yell or hit. You meet a man who is kind and patient, loving and who adores you. Smile he thinks that everything the world has thrown in your way you have dodged beautifully and with grace and dignity.

You are a strong women but buckle your seat belt  - the universe has decided you are the only one who can ride out the storms about to come your way. Just remember this came to pass it didn't come to stay. In the middle of all the chaos it will be the little things that keep you holding on so stop and savor them while you have them.

Love me.

PS I have heard that turning 40 is the new 20 and women everywhere are having the most fun then - so hey its something to look forward to.. Oh and ditch the haircut your sporting it seriously looks like crap.

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  1. My mother was married to an abusive man and it truly changes you. Life has a funny way of working its way out. Thank you for sharing something so personal.

    1. it really does change everything. thanks for taking the time to comment

  2. I have been around abusive men and I am so glad you got out!!



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