Thursday, December 29, 2005

I have been tagged

One of my closest friends, Radiovixen tagged me, and said my blog needed updating so here are my answers.

Four jobs you've had in your life: Waitress, hostess, webmistress, currently a paralegal

Four movies you could watch over and over: Steel Magnolias, To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything Julie Newmyer, Fried Green Tomatoes, Grease 2

Four places you've lived: California, Florida, Germany, Colorado.

Four TV shows you love to watch: ER, Greys Anatomy, Desperate Housewives, Dr 90210

Four websites you visit daily: Sweetpotatoqueens, The courts website.

Four of your favorite foods: Egg Rolls, steak, sausage biscuits & gravy, shrimp.

Four places you'd rather be: The beach in Florida - thats it thats the list

Four albums you can't live without: damn all my stuff is mixed CD's Pat Benatar's greatest hits, Match Box Twenty (any of them), Lisa Marie Prestly's Now What, Prince Purple Rain.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Its the season to be freaking jolly.

Gimmie a break - Jolly my ass.

If it is the season to be jolly then why is the day after Thanksgiving referred to as Black Friday? Want to see just how jolly it is. Go to Toys R Us that Friday and watch how jolly the parents are as they claw, scream, bite and punch their way to this years "gotta have it toy".

These oh so jolly people are the same people who will steal your parking spot at the mall after you have circled the parking lot for 45 mins looking for ANY spot not already occupied, then they will have the nerve to flip you off as you slam on your breaks to avoid hitting their car as you look at them in utter shock.

Once you make it into the mall, you will be treated to frazzled mothers yelling, screaming tantrum throwning, snot running from their nose "little angels". As dear old dad looks around fervently wishing that aliens would come kidnap him and anal probe him because that would be more pleasant than dealing with the fruit of his loins and the haggard shrew that was once his glowing bride. Yeah Jolly whatfreakinever!

If you procrastinate on shopping the above scene only gets worse, the only thing that will save your ass now is a super Wal-mart at 3 am, or Christmas shopping at the local gas station.

After you brave all of this in search of the perfect gift for the oh so picky Aunt Enda, pain staking gift wrap it in the perfect paper. Carefully transport it to the specified family gathering place and smilingly hand it to her. She will then rip the paper to shreds, turn said object in all directions then look at you as if you punched in the nose and gave her tickets to the nearest fat farm and say "Well I see you grabbed the first thing you saw in the discount bin at the dollar store".

Next year do yourself a favor purchase gift certificates on-line and then book yourself a week at the spa..

Tis the season to be freaking jolly... Bite me Santa

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Perceptions..

Dictionary.com defines perception as

per·cep·tion () Pronunciation Key (p r-s p sh n)n.
The process, act, or faculty of perceiving.
The effect or product of perceiving.
Psychology.
Recognition and interpretation of sensory stimuli based chiefly on memory.
The neurological processes by which such recognition and interpretation are effected.

Insight, intuition, or knowledge gained by perceiving.
The capacity for such insight.
[Middle English percepcioun, from Old French percepcion, from Latin percepti , percepti n-, from perceptus, past participle of percipere, to perceive. See perceive.]


The definition sounds so cold when you think about what peoples perceptions do to you and your psyche.

How does what others think about you effect you? Does it matter? What if it was a friend? Most will say they don’t care what others think. Yeah whatever. To some degree we do care, some care too much.

What happens when a friend doesn’t like something about you, or says that you have changed and now they are not sure about you or your actions. (To be clear I am referring to drug or alcohol abuse.) I am referring to the normal ebb and flow of life. Every situation changes a person to some degree. This can not be helped its just a fact of life.

Does that give someone the right to tell you that you have changed too much; or that they are not sure of your behavior? What if you can’t help it? Some situations that you deal with are bound to leave you angry, hurt, or depressed to a degree. You walk away from every hill, every journey with something about you and your character different.

How do you then deal with people turning their backs on you because of the changes? Do you fake it so that they are comfortable? Do you get through that journey changed a bit yet again and move on? Is it right for the other person to impose their will on you so that you act exactly they way they want or so that you never grow or expand? How do you recover from people turning away from you because you are not and can not be who you once were?

Friday, August 26, 2005

Random thoughts

Its been forever since I updated. This has been the never ending summer. Between my own surgery and illness to my family having multiple surgical proceedures to my 14 year old tossing our family head first in the deep end of mental issues, I am really looking forward to the end of this summer.

I am tired both physicially and mentally and to be honest the universe can find someone else to go pick on for a change, I'm kinda done. At the beginning of this I put on my big girl panties and delt, at this point I'm looking for my blankie and the fetal position.

Friday, July 08, 2005

The shit people do

The last few weeks of my life have been one hell of a ride. I am drained, yet it amazes me the shit people do and try to pull. The level of stupid people achieve is astounding.

I have been informed that I should no longer be allowed in public unsupervised any longer, or at any rate Target, let me assure you I am in fact a grown woman and this "lady" deserved it.

I was picking up a few items after work and not really in a shopping mood persay more of a toss it in the cart and lets go mood. I came around the corner and saw this woman on a cell phone with a toddler in a cart, and 2 older children ages about 5 and 7 running willy nilly through out the store. Every once in a while she would stop her conversation and whine, y'all stop running away from me. After a little bit of this I promptly went over to her put a sweet smile on my face and told her to get her ass off her damn cell phone and tend to her children before she was the next sobbing soul I saw on the 10:00 news talking about how she only turned her sorry back for a second and they were gone.

This digressed to her saying "Well I NEVER" to which I replied "Maybe you shouldn't have and saved us all 2 snot nosed brats you don't/won't parent that in a few years have decided that the world OWES something to. She informed me that I shouldn't be allowed in public alone, I infomed her it was to bad that citizens have to pass 3 different tests to drive a car legally but any one can procreate.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

30 Things you would love to say at work.

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of crap.
2 How about never? Is never good for you?
3. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
4. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.
5. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
6. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
7. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
8. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.
9. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
10. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
11. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you
12.Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
13. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
14. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
15. What am I flypaper for freaks?
16. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
17. And your crybaby whiny opinion would be..?
18. Do I look like a people person?
19. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
20. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
21. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer
22. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
23. Who lit the fuse on your tampon?
24. Oh I get it... like humor... but different.
25. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
26. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
27. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
28. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
29. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.
30. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

The evils of Sonic and Predisone

My doctor put me on predisone to chill out my sinuses and get me ready for surgery next week. Predizone makes me PMS no matter if "Aunt Flo" is scheduled to appear or not. Sonic has come out with a new Cookie Dough breeze.

Yesterday, while my darling Banker Boy (my husband) and I were at Sonic I happened to notice this wonderful treat on the ordering board, but not until after I had already attempted to order a Reese peanut buttercup blast and settled for an M&M one. Then and only then do I see the new poster. I decided that right there I must have one and forget the M&M crap.

Enter the problem - I am not the one driving and therefore do not have access the the little push button on the box that summons the faceless voice inside. Banker Boy's first though is no honey you already ordered. To which I smile and replied "But I don't want that one any longer and it won't taste the same". We debate this for a few minutes and watch as everyone else around us gets their orders. After about 5 minutes, Banker Boy decides they have taken this long they can change the order anyhow. (Plus I think aliens return his brain in this short time frame.) He pushes the button and informs another faceless voice that we want to change the order. I think he also remembered in those short minutes that the medication makes me bawl at the drop of a hat and he didn't have any tissues or the desire to sleep on the couch.

I am sure that the faceless woman who has taken the request is cussing me up one side and down the other because it appears that she had finally just made the original order. I didn't feel to bad for to long, I must have my cookie dough.

We get back home (we live 2 minutes from the Sonic) and I stick my spoon in the wonderful looking concoction. Take a bite and it is heavenly. It was worth all of the fuss to make it mine.

The predisone is still evil, between the cravings and the mood swings, but at least I have a Sonic Cookie Dough Blast band aid to make it a bit easier to endure.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

First entry

Wow first post. Often these are like first dates and you never know what to say. Lets see I am 29 (ok thats what I will admit to ;-) ) Married, a mother to a 13 year old girlchild with an attitude. I have 2 cats that I adore.

I am a SPQ (sweet potato queen) and play often on the message board. I am a Paralegal, Hubby is a Bank Manager. The past few weeks I have been hit with some sort of off the wall virus no one can quite figure out. All the doctors can do is pat me on the head hand me a script and charge me a co-pay.

How to spot a bad girl

Bad girls sip only champagne and cocktails - not beer, wine, sherry, mineral water, cafe latte, or Darjeeling tea. Think Martinis, Stingers, Black Russians. Bad girls prefer spandex, halters, high heels, fishnet stockings, silk, suede, leather, or white satin cut on the bias and black satin cut down to here.

Bad girls have blond, raven or flaming tresses, red mouths and nails. Think Mae West, Rita Hayworth, Ava Gardner. But the baddest girls have mousy brown hair. Bad girls wear capri pants, mules, cashmere or mohair twinsets, silk scarves covering their pin curls and black sunglasses to the grocery store, then don black tuxedos and silver fox boas at night.Bad girls are in touch with their inner bitch because they run with dobermans wearing studded black leather collars.

Bad girls travel to Vegas with their ex's gold card while their own name is still on it. Are passionately loyal to their friends. Have been known to torture those who break the hearts of pals. Bad girls call the psychic friends network. Have their own astrologer. Know a cusp is not an intimately transmitted condition.

Bad girls listen to Billy Holiday. Know the importance of regular waxing. Bad girls exercise muscles the rest of us don't even know we have. Bad girls smell expensive and never leave the house without wearing fabulous earrings. Read Nietzsche. Buy the National Enquirer. Can pronounce Goethe and recite Fleurs du Mal. Bad girls use cigarette holders; really bad girls attend cigar dinners.Bad girls like disguises: they like presenting themselves as perfect moms, ice princesses, and librarians.

Bad girls are passionate while the rest of the world is cool. Prefer gold to silver. Bare their midriffs, never their souls. Bad girls make hay on Ralph Lauren sheets. Bad girls never marry for love which is why they often change their names. Really bad girls have numbered bank accounts. Bad girls know it's not the cards your dealt but how well you play your hand. Bad girls win at blackjack. Vacation at backgammon tournaments in Monaco. Frequent pool halls but shoot billards. Have a bookie, accountant, and lawyer on retainer.

Bad girls send large checks to good causes and never take a tax deduction. Bad girls don't just want to have fun, they make sure they do. Bad girls are committed to the philosophy of personal pleasure.Most of us are only bad girls in our dreams. But there's a pattern in bad-girl lifestyle that deserves contemplation. Bad girls buy what they want to buy, eat what they want to eat, wear what they want to wear, sleep when they want to sleep.

Bad girls do not have therapists because they don't need them. Instead, they have housekeepers and masseuses.Bad girls realize this isn't a dress rehearsal. Real life is what you make of it.You can be bad. You can be good. You just sure as hell better be authentic."

Wednesday Confess Sess

I can't wear heels anymore so I have turned into a sneakerhead.  My first pair of Adidas are due in today and I am beyond excited. I use...