That's where I am at today - it just sucks.. Frankly it always will. Things wish you had done or not, will come back time and time again to kick you in your crotch when you least expect it. That is today for me..
Its been an emotional day and in someways it feel like I am right back where I was 14 years ago.. Regardless of where you are in life or what you have going on, that one thing just taps you on the shoulder and says "here I am, I didn't go away" then starts kicking.
No matter what you have done to move past it, if all the parties have not, you also never will. No matter how many times you apologize or attempt to atone, it will always be there. After years pass some details will fade others altered slightly, but always still there... You realize there really isn't anything you can do, its up to the person who holds on to the pain, clings tightly to the wrongs and shakes the finger in your face when when they get notion.
You also come to realize unless you block that person out or the search out help that's just how its always going to be. Due to circumstances you can't cut them off or out so what you have left is to hold on to the slim sliver of light that shines occasionally, hope that they figure out what that the very thing they cling to is the poison of their undoing. They are the only ones who hold the key in resolving anything and you just breathe.
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